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 Kamalam's Hobbies
Navi
 Posted: Jul 29 2018, 12:50 AM
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QUOTE (Kamalam @ Jul 28 2018, 11:24 PM)
QUOTE (Shecoda @ Jul 28 2018, 12:06 PM)
So...If we are going to do this kind of philosophical stuff here, do I get rid of the philosophy forum?

Or would a general philosophy thread be in order so we may all remember where philosophical thoughts and discussion are to be found rather than trying to keep track of philosophical discussions that appear here and there in various locations and threads?


Oh, I didn't even think about that. But that makes total sense. I'll try to post in the appropriate forum from now on.
Oh. This is your thread. I don't see any reason why you should have to divide what you want to post here and parcel it out all over the board. I had realized that my posting the long poem specifically used up a lot of space on something that didn't have to do with you and your activities.
Posting it in the philosophy thread was a good idea so I did it. //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/smile.gif

Besides it wouldn't be the first time we had multiple discussions going simultaneously on similar topics in different threads.
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Kamalam
 Posted: Aug 8 2018, 09:16 PM
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This little diatribe might more appropriately be "Kam's Musings" which I guess can fall under "Kam's Hobbies" because I certainly do muse about things often. //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/tongue.gif

Today Sky had a well check appointment and the pediatrician was male. This is the first time he's had a male doctor and we thought it might make Sky more comfortable. So what happens right off the bat? The doctor would only talk to Stan. Eye contact only with Stan. I'm the one with the vaccination information, I'm the one with questions about what he needs before starting middle school.

But I'm clearly not the one the doctor wanted to address. The last time this happened was with the cranky landscaper we hired when we first moved into this house. I put his rudeness down to a clear case of alcoholism and pure orneriness.

But the doctor? Gawd. https://s20.postimg.cc/owean7lkt/vudu.gif I think it's because I contradicted him when he said that Sky must have been homeschooled because he was missing so many vaccinations. No, I told him. He's only missing a couple of the polio shots and has been regularly attending public school. Middle school kindly reminded us that we fell behind on polio.

I guess that's all it took, because he really didn't want to deal with me after that.

It seems, and I could be wrong here, that when certain men don't get the response they expect, they shut down and label the woman they're talking to as argumentative, hysterical, or simply troublesome.

I'll get over it but man, it's depressing sometimes. Either I'll have to constantly tip toe around some male egos or I'm going to have to accept that I'll be potential put down or blatantly ignored when I disagree. //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/sad.gif
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Beerboy
 Posted: Aug 9 2018, 03:32 PM
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QUOTE (Kamalam @ Aug 8 2018, 08:16 PM)
This little diatribe might more appropriately be "Kam's Musings" which I guess can fall under "Kam's Hobbies" because I certainly do muse about things often.  //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/tongue.gif

Today Sky had a well check appointment and the pediatrician was male. This is the first time he's had a male doctor and we thought it might make Sky more comfortable. So what happens right off the bat? The doctor would only talk to Stan. Eye contact only with Stan. I'm the one with the vaccination information, I'm the one with questions about what he needs before starting middle school.

But I'm clearly not the one the doctor wanted to address. The last time this happened was with the cranky landscaper we hired when we first moved into this house. I put his rudeness down to a clear case of alcoholism and pure orneriness.

But the doctor? Gawd.  https://s20.postimg.cc/owean7lkt/vudu.gif I think it's because I contradicted him when he said that Sky must have been homeschooled because he was missing so many vaccinations. No, I told him. He's only missing a couple of the polio shots and has been regularly attending public school. Middle school kindly reminded us that we fell behind on polio.

I guess that's all it took, because he really didn't want to deal with me after that.

It seems, and I could be wrong here, that when certain men don't get the response they expect, they shut down and label the woman they're talking to as argumentative, hysterical, or simply troublesome.

I'll get over it but man, it's depressing sometimes. Either I'll have to constantly tip toe around some male egos or I'm going to have to accept that I'll be potential put down or blatantly ignored when I disagree.  //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/sad.gif
Alprazolam! //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/wink.gif
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Kamalam
 Posted: Aug 9 2018, 03:48 PM
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Alprazolam? Why? Who needs to be medicated?
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Skookum
 Posted: Aug 9 2018, 04:03 PM
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user posted image
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Kamalam
 Posted: Aug 9 2018, 11:41 PM
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QUOTE (Skookum @ Aug 9 2018, 12:03 PM)
user posted image

I'm so confused. This is the second time medication is mentioned? I'm not sure what prompted this from my post above... https://s20.postimg.cc/so23xtujh/scratchhead2.gif
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Skookum
 Posted: Aug 10 2018, 12:57 AM
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QUOTE (Kamalam @ Aug 9 2018, 08:41 PM)
QUOTE (Skookum @ Aug 9 2018, 12:03 PM)
user posted image

I'm so confused. This is the second time medication is mentioned? I'm not sure what prompted this from my post above... https://s20.postimg.cc/so23xtujh/scratchhead2.gif

I have no idea. //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/rolleyes.gif I just thought that cartoon sorta fit here & was hysterically funny & ironic considering the long list of side effects most all medications have these days.
Believe me, nothing in your post at all prompted this; user posted image it was BeerBoy who instigated it.
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Navi
 Posted: Aug 10 2018, 01:36 AM
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Sure hope you don't get that doctor in the draw next visit Sky needs.
Not sure just what his issue was, but he obviously has one. Maybe he's just young, fresh out of school and this is his first job? I say that because of his homeschooling crack. Young and dumb and making assumptions. //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/dry.gif

As for tiptoeing around egos, I no longer do that no matter the gender. I make an ass of myself repeatedly, but at this point it is better they get the message. Most just discount what I have to say and continually repeat what they had said without acknowledging my question or comment. If it doesn't fit into their programmed thought process and mindset I am automatically labeled either a nut or confused and worthy of patronizing. Screw 'em! Every now and then I run into someone who acknowledges and enters into dialogue about the topic. I think most of 'em just go by rote, and want you in and out asap. Easy to document, meets middle managements requirements for number of patients seen in a specified amount of time, etc.
I have noticed that the notes my doctors post on the documentation pages of the patient portals are usually a formula report, not reflecting what we actually discussed. Easier to document and easier to code for billing.
Shame, but that is what modern medicine has become.
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grumpychick
 Posted: Aug 10 2018, 02:08 PM
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Kam,

I'm sorry you had that experience. I have run into similar attitudes and it's insulting and demeaning. //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/mad.gif

I hope that you are able to see a different pediatrician in the future. If you do have some freedom of choice in the doctors you see, it might be worth googling potential providers and reading any reviews you find.

After one particularly dismissive doctor experience, I googled the doctor and found a few reviews that corroborated my experience and no positive reviews. It was validating to know I wasn't the only one who felt that way after dealing with this particular doctor.

With that said, I've had some wonderful doctors who had no reviews online anywhere. People are probably more motivated to complain online than they are to praise.

Anyway, you deserve to be listened to, especially when it comes to your child's health. And I'm sorry this particular individual didn't treat you that way. *hugs*
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Shecoda
 Posted: Aug 10 2018, 03:07 PM
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Kam, I don't tiptoe around people either. I would make sure I never saw that doctor again. If you have insurance you have rights and one of those is a doctor that you are comfortable with.

If you can change, while doing so, make a complaint about the other doctor. Enough complaints and he will either be told to shape up or will be gone.

I would have told him point blank that he needs to address me also, not just my husband. If he didn't like it too bad. You and Stan are paying him and therefore he is in your employ. He is not an authority figure he is a doctor.

Listen to me. Unsolicited advice. People who are predators or biased read us (women) well. His intent probably was to shut you down. And it worked. He figured you wouldn't push the issue and you didn't. He read you well. You didn't stand up for yourself.

You only get the respect you demand. I would have demanded respect.

In my case, I would have been a bit abrasive, but then I have an edge. There are very nice ways to stand up for yourself and you could explore those if you aren't abrasive.

I always think, what would a man do here if this were happening to him. Would he stand up for himself? Women need to start acting like men and stop taking bulls___.
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Shecoda
 Posted: Aug 10 2018, 03:20 PM
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QUOTE (Navi @ Jul 28 2018, 09:50 PM)
QUOTE (Kamalam @ Jul 28 2018, 11:24 PM)
QUOTE (Shecoda @ Jul 28 2018, 12:06 PM)
So...If we are going to do this kind of philosophical stuff here, do I get rid of the philosophy forum?

Or would a general philosophy thread be in order so we may all remember where philosophical thoughts and discussion are to be found rather than trying to keep track of philosophical discussions that appear here and there in various locations and threads?


Oh, I didn't even think about that. But that makes total sense. I'll try to post in the appropriate forum from now on.
Oh. This is your thread. I don't see any reason why you should have to divide what you want to post here and parcel it out all over the board. I had realized that my posting the long poem specifically used up a lot of space on something that didn't have to do with you and your activities.
Posting it in the philosophy thread was a good idea so I did it. //files.jcink.net/html/emoticons/smile.gif

Besides it wouldn't be the first time we had multiple discussions going simultaneously on similar topics in different threads.


Here was the thinking. Sometimes people remember there was a conversation about a certain subject. If whatever is being posted is in a forum made for that subject it is a lot easier to find if someone wants to further the discussion.

I know, I have many a time looked for something I knew was on the old forum, and searching 10 years of posts only to never find the discussion I was looking for, mainly because it was in a thread off topic. I realize that some threads drift, but specifically putting a subject in a forum with another topic heading when there is an existing forum with that topic heading makes it hard to find.

How many posts and further discussions have been missed because a discussion can't be found? I suggested posting in a forum set up for that subject to make it easier to find and reply to. It makes for greater continuity of a subject.
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Kamalam
 Posted: Aug 10 2018, 11:49 PM
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From the bottom of my heart, thank you ladies for your words of encouragement and advice.

Navi, the doctor was not young, sadly! That might explain a little of his attitude. I got the impression he was just dialing it in. Look in eyes, check. Nose, check. Open your mouth and say, "Ah" kind of stuff. We had to have it just to get the vaccinations. But if something was really wrong, I'm sure this guy would never have spotted it.

After we get the next two shots we'll be caught up and after that we're switching pediatricians. Good points on googling someone and finding a sense of validation, GC! I think I've seen 2 -3 stars on this pediatric group but now I am taking that much more seriously.

Shecoda and Navi, I'm definitely getting to the age where I don't want to tip-toe around a-holes anymore. I've been afraid to rock the boat. But it seems to get rocked regardless. Thank you for telling it like it is no matter what. I need to hear it.

Love you all to bits! https://s20.postimg.cc/vt8gzucrh/thank_you.gif
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